Dream Boy.

I dremt of him again. He was was there and I was safe. I was whole.

He's not real. I know.
He's figment of my imagination.
A boy I've never met before but somehow I love him wholeheartedly.

I've only ever experienced love in my dreams.
And it was always for him.

He's always the same.
Same smile.
Same voice.
Same everything.

And I miss him when I wake up.
Like I'm suddenly missing something.
A feeling that's with me all day.

A feeling I can't shake, no matter what.

I can't help but think maybe this boy actually exist somewhere and it's God's way of letting me know that he DOES exist and that I'll know him when I meet him. That he does have someone for me and that I'm not as alone as I like to make myself out to be.

I can't explain these dreams properly. They almost never make sense but that part doesn't matter. The part that matters is that he's there and that we're together. When he grabs my hand it's like an electric shock that turns into a warmth that fills my whole body. He's smile makes my world brighter and when I'm with him I feel infinitely safe. Like not even the end of the world could touch me while I'm with him.

Until.

Until I wake up. Alone. Disappointed.
I forget his face almost instantly but he's still somehow imprinted in my mind.
I start to get the feeling that I've forgotten something.
I feel like I'm missing something.

I don't know.
It's an odd feeling that I just can't explain.


Maybe none of this makes sense but then again make it makes all the sense in the world.
All I know is that I dread waking up for these dreams.
And when I finally do I can't shake that feeling away.
No matter what I'm doing or whom I'm with.
It's like a piece is missing.
And no matter how hard I look, I might not ever find it.

But.
Maybe.
Maybe one day I will.